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Posts Tagged ‘emotions’

An emotional beggar is one, who begs for “attention”.  He is not able to define himself as a person; he is like a homeless soul, always searching for another soul imagining that another soul will be his succor to becoming a whole person

Sometimes the fear of the emotional beggar is so high he believes that he will just disappear if he doesn’t have another person for constant support. He hates himself and the other for this situation.

He is thus caught in a paradox situation. His begging bowl fulfills his emotional security, but he craves the independence of standing on his own emotional feet without the bowl.

He craves attention or sympathy constantly to fill his bowl. What he does not recognize is sympathy or attention does not equal love. Love needs no bowl to be filled, it is just there. A person has to first start loving himself very deeply; inside out, good and bad, the evil within and the goodness outside.  Only then will his bowl fall by the wayside…  It sounds very simple but this is the toughest part for an emotional beggar to come to terms with. We have to recognize and understand that we all have similar emotional attributes, just like we all have 2 hands , 2 legs, 1 nose, 2 eyes and so on and so forth.

Our emotional makeup is all the same. We all have a dose of good and a dose of bad within us. It is society that defines the good and the bad. The more we try and define ourselves the more we tie ourselves in knots. Loving ourselves just the way we are, is what makes an essential difference to ourselves. Acceptance of this in a wholesome way is true bliss.

Understanding and admitting the evil within is the most difficult part. We believe that a person should only be good… that’s like expecting a person to be born with just a body and a mind, no soul.

All souls are inherently good and bad, we like to recognize them as black and white, never understanding that they are all made up of myriad colours, and as we spin this wheel of colours it will always appear white and pure.

The emotional beggar needs to understand that attention, and sympathy and what he falsely recognizes as love cannot come from emotional begging. Rather than begging he needs to develop the strength in himself and recognize his own colourful soul.

He can start this by coming to terms with the evil within, hidden in many deep layers of fancy clothing, like false pride and hypocrisy. He needs to embrace his goodness too and accept himself as a whole… We think of ourselves as “unique” but we are not, we are just as equal as the person beside us. He has no less and we have no less or more of emotional anguish. It all equals when the spin-wheel is spinning. It is white, pure and reality. We can love ourselves.

Love is strength; strength to accept the spin-wheel. When we have accepted all those colours ((emotions)) of anger love hate and joy; all those actions of good, evil, selfish and loving; when we ASSIMILATE these into our very being ((our souls)) then we stop spinning, we are all white, pure and love radiates from us; we become grounded.

The emotional beggar ceases to exist.

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I have lived in a cage all my life.

The cage is my mind. It is like fishing net. It drops on me and binds me unexpectedly. I feel like the fish caught in the fisherman’s net. I struggle against the many fine threads (thoughts) that bind me, knowing that there is no form of escape. Yet just like all other fish I struggle until my last breath to escape to freedom.

Freedom from what I wonder? From the thoughts that cage me? Freedom which leads me where?

Freedom leads towards our instincts, into the vast unacknowledged ocean of feelings and emotions. But the ocean is vast much more than I ever imagined and I long again for the security of my thoughts my cage, my mind.

Why is the human being so lost? Because we have forgotten our instincts we have forgotten to commune with nature. Nature is the great mother Goddess; she has created us and our destiny.

Pagan civilizations have worshiped every facet of nature and all emotion in every form. Simplistically they had a deity or God also representing it, a deity that had to be worshiped.

What is worship to me? Worship is an acknowledgment. Not a devotional prayer.

Worship is an acknowledgment of every emotion and feeling that I carry within myself. Recognizing it is the first step to self awareness. Denying a feeling is like denying the God within.

Our emotions allow us to feel love as well as anger but our thoughts cage us in guilt and fear. This is a paralyzing situation and it leads us to a stressful existence.

The human instinct is lost in a sea of a monetized civilization that enslaves our mind. Our instinct has changed from being guided by nature to being guided by money leading to “greed” “envy” and “lust”.

Think about it, our entire mental universe is all about “money” and “power” and “fame”. Yet our emotional universe is about “love and joy” and also about “anger and fear”.

To me denying my anger and my fear is like denying my love and my joy. I can’t feel one without the other.

According to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs when our basic needs of ‘hunger, thirst, sex and recognition’ are fulfilled we embark on the path to self realization which is the inward journey towards our natural self.

Hunger and thirst have been replaced with money. Sex has been replaced with lust and power.

Recognition which is actually recognition of the “self within” is replaced by fame.

Is it any wonder then that these never get fulfilled? We always seek more since it is not our natural need and we always envy others who have more, this is our trap.

So how do we free ourselves from this trap?

The place to start would be the understanding that this is a trap we create ourselves. It is not circumstances that create the trap. We create the circumstances by continuously living our life out of tune with our natural path.

Our natural path is our “karma”. It is the acceptance that the master puppeteer is ME; MYSELF; acting out the play on the stage of life already set by my “karma”. We instinctively know when we are out of tune with our “karma”, it’s the inner voice.

One may wonder: Where is the human spirit? Where is the free will?

It is there within us. The human spirit is the self within, the spirit is that which acknowledges or worships every facet of nature and is actually always alive whether in this physical body or not.

The free will is the action that we take to act out our emotions and fulfill our needs in tune with our natural self. It means exercising our right to act out according to what “karma” has planned for us. If we fight this natural path laid out for us then we create a set of stressful circumstances and keep creating them until we finally come to the realization that we are against our natural path.

Following a path with the knowledge that one is in tune with one’s own nature is a powerfully releasing emotion.

This is where we use our mind creatively. This is where we become truly ourselves.

This is where the mind ceases to be a cage.

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